Dusting Off the Pen

Oct 13, 2017 by     4 Comments    Posted under: Blog


“The heart is an arrow. It demands aim to land true.” — Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo, someone vastly more talented than me.

A few months ago I decided to pick up an empty notebook and a pen. I felt a restless unease and thought writing would help. Surely my years in Japan would be an abundant source of inspiration, ready to be tapped and spilled from my head into descriptive bouts of wisdom I would share to the world. And yet the page remained blank.

That’s when I began to panic.


The irony of the situation is that writing shouldn’t be a foreign act to me; I write for a living. Kind of. When I’m not editing the unending dismal mountain of paperwork of presentations, emails, and memos during the day, I work as a novel video game translator during the night. When I’m doing neither, I’m in the continual on-again-off-again quest to obtain my N1 Japanese Language Proficiency Certification which I failed to do last summer, being a measly 6 points away from the coveted prize.

The core of the problem is that I’ve spent all my years here translating and interpreting the thoughts of others that I neglected my own thoughts and skills to the point of them nary existing. Which begs the question: do I even have any original thoughts of my own, or the skills to adequately describe them eloquently?

I am not sure even what to write about anymore. I maintained a blog in my early years of Japan while I was still a bright-eyed, bushy-tailed teacher when everything was still new and exciting, whose own naivety became my undoing as I was later on conned out of hours of unpaid work and almost two years of my life from a black company.  Creativity can wait when survival and the cultivation of skills to survive (i.e. Japanese proficiency) suddenly and simultaneously became the boon and bane of my existence.

I guess dusting off the ol’ pen and paper, or blog in this case, is a way for me to not only keep a record of my own-goings, but to see if I can comprehend or make any semblance of what has transpired the last few years. Somehow if I can make meaning out of my own ridiculousness, I may be able to take aim on my restlessness and see where my heart takes me.

Welcome to my blog. I hope you enjoy the journey.

4 Comments + Add Comment

  • YAY! Blogging rules!

  • Sorry to hear that the last couple years have been rough for you! Hopefully the next few years are looking up. Looking forward to reading more from you!

  • Hey guys,

    I’m still trying to get a hang of “blogging” and all of the features of WordPress and this particular theme, but I hope to post more soon.

    Thanks for commenting!

    Ian> Dudeeeee, how’s it been? You need to update me on how the production side of games is going for you.

    Gordo> I sous vide two steaks so Marc can have something tasty once he landed in Japan from his brief visit to Canada. He gave both the steaks and I the look of love. Hahaha.

  • Haha, I don’t even know where to start! Been doing a lot of stuff since finishing up the Life Goes On expansion last year. Aside from just ongoing support stuff we’ve been translating the game into a bunch of different languages and that’s worked out pretty well for us!

    On my own end I’ve been plugging away at a new project that I haven’t really announced publicly yet. It’s turned out to be absurdly ambitious, especially since I’m the only one working on it. I started it two years ago and it’s only just started to take shape, and my insistence on making it primarily an online multiplayer game has been a bit of an adventure. Also, possibly incredibly stupid. We’ll see!

    Do you still have my email (or are able to pull it from my comments)? It’d be easier to go back and forth that way, since I don’t get notifications when you reply here.

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